Saturday, 25 September 2010

In need of a back story...

"So you'd like to audition for the show?"
"Well, most importantly can you sing?"
"I really think so - my voice has been described as a cross between Etta James and Billie Holiday."
"Never heard of either of them. A couple more questions.  How old are you?"
"Do you have any children?"
"Oh, well, never mind.  Has anyone in your family recently died from or been diagnosed with a serious illness?"
"Ah, shame. Let's try something else - are you from a broken home? Do you claim benefits? Do you have a criminal or educational record that precludes you from employment?"
"No, no and no."
"Problematic.  One last question - could you say on camera with genuine belief and without a hint of irony or sarcasm that the X Factor would be your 'last chance'?"
"'Last chance' for what?"
"Fame, fortune, meaning in your life, a future for you and your family, to make anything of yourself."
"Obviously not, no.  That's ridiculous."
"You would think so wouldn't you. I'm sorry - you're just not the type of person we're looking for."

No comments:

Post a Comment